Bill's People.

Right before Christmas I had a second round interview with Microsoft for a job pseudo in my field.

I wasn't super excited about the position, but I was stoked to have an interview. It's the next closet thing to a job. I figured although the job wasn't everything I was looking for, maybe the people there would make it fun and worth it.

But they wouldn't have made it so. Bill's people were faker than Barbie.

To start, the whole interview process was odd. I saw my competition from the get-go. There were three of us on rotation to interview with our three potential bosses. It was a timed ordeal. After 20 minutes, the head-hunter would knock for us to switch. Felt like musical chairs, minus the music and the fun.

Each interviewer was trying to get an idea about me from such a controlled setting, as well as glorify a job that sounded as disciplined as an assembly line. Neither worked. I couldn't be me when I'm spoken to like the next jello mold to fill. I'm no cookie cutter cut out for Corporate.

I asked one of the interviewers what she liked about her job, and she responded knowing that she's making a difference. I wanted to laugh out loud, but giggled inside instead. Making a difference isn't saturating the world with more Microsoft product and your bland deliverables. It's advocating to end world hunger and homelessness. To strive for world peace. It's walking a dog at the humane society, tutoring a child in a foreign language, planting a community organic garden in a rural, poverty-stricken neighborhood.

At the days end, I was exhausted from all the fake these people were exuding on me. The head-hunter walked me out and asked if I were to be extended an offer, would I take it? I hesitated. I told her that I would definitely have to sleep on it.

The next day I was informed by the head-hunter that I wasn't chosen for the position. She asked if I wanted to hear the feedback from those at Microsoft. I said, "Of course!"

They told her that I seemed uncomfortable and was awkward at times. I immediately stopped her and said, "You know what? That makes total sense. I wasn't in my comfort zone. I don't thrive in superficial settings. I don't think I'm cut out for Corporate. I'm more me in a creative, ad agency type of environment where I can have a beer and drop the F bomb on occasion."

She said, "Well then maybe it worked out for the best."

And I'd have to more than agree.

Sad Awakening.

I cried on the drive there.  I cried in the waiting room. I cried because this is what it has come to. I cried seeing the many others out there seeking the same help. I cried because they may be more worse off than me. I cried when I told the lady what I have left in my bank account. I cried thinking how thankful I am to have this sort of governmental assistance. I cried because I'm sick of being underpaid or not paid at all for the work that I do. I cried because in a fucked up way, this is a pretty interesting and cool life experience I'm experiencing.

Yesterday was an emotional day. I really had an awakening. A super sad wake up call to my financial status. I am poor.

I  am poor like everyone else that was waiting to hear their name called at the Washington Connection. Waiting to tell their struggle story. Mine went something like this: I moved up two months ago, and have been doing absolutely everything I can to land a job. I'm a full time job seeker who often works overtime. I have a journalism degree from one of the top J schools in the country. I'm fluent in two languages. I have experience. What the fuck? Does it really matter anymore; a college degree?

Never would of thought I'd get here. I'll get myself out.

Scammers.

I posted an ad on Craigslist for my services as a Spanish tutor. Trying to get some sort of income going, and all I get back is a response from a damn scammer. How do I know it's a scammer? We sent a couple emails back and forth. See for yourself:

Scammer: Hello...Are you available to teach my son a lesson under your service..email me
back with your charges..

Me: Hola! I am still available to tutor Spanish. Tell me more about your son. How old is he? What is his level of Spanish? Is he taking Spanish in school? Does he have curriculum to follow? Where are you located in the Seattle area? I charge $30/hr. If needed, I am willing to compromise on this. Gracias!

Scammer: Hello, Thanks for getting back to me and everything sound good to me, Am Mrs Clark  by name, my son is coming  for an holiday in your (CITY), His name is Micheal and is 16 years old .I want him to be busy in the time of the day,because am in Spain for business trip i will be back
in 2 months Time that is why i  want him to be lesson,..I will want you to email me back with your price and i have decided to let him attend your lesson and he will be coming 2 hour in a day ,also get
back  to me with your own convenient time and day you want my son to be coming in 2 days in a week and i haves Someone (Nanny) that will always drives him down to  your lesson center..I will be happy if  you can help my son because my son is highly interested in your tutor lesson.. Make sure you check your email often if there is any emergency or important notice

Kindly get back to me with your information below to be on the check.....

Name:
Full address: Not P.O.BOX
City:
State:
Postal Code:
Phone Number: That i can send text message

Hope to read back from you with the details requested


I will NOT be responding to this last thread. She didn't answer my questions about her son's "level."What is this in 'your (CITY)' thing?....Who would have a nanny drop off their kid with a stranger?

F*!& no will I be giving you my address! And, whoever this is needs to be searching for English tutors instead of Spanish ones.

Stamps.

I figured the day I applied for food stamps would be no less than the appropriate day to begin this blog.

I should have started it two months ago. To bring you along for the ride. To see if you could hold on tight for as long as I have.

Who does this? Goes to a city w/o any big leads in hopes to do more than just survive? To make it big? Or to just make it? Silly me. I do it.

Guess it's what dreamers and go-getters do. It's a risky risk.

I've heard, though, that nothing worth it is easy, but I honestly didn't think it would be this hard. 

I just got back from Spain where I kept up a blog on my struggle to find work in an economic recession. Now I'm back in my own damn country, writing the same damn struggle-blog. Sick of writing about strife. But I guess you can't get to success w/o a fight.